Yours in companionable silence

Other than the sound of my hand moving the pencil across the page.

Photo by Thought Catalog on Unsplash

Hello, how are you all ?

I almost shared this on Friday but then fish and chips arrived and I sat down on the sofa and started watching the new series of Shetland. In no time I was lost in in the scenery, the storyline and Ashley Jensen’s outdoorsy wardrobe. Thick woollen jumpers! Boots! A grey woollen coat! An oversized tartan scarf!

Then Saturday came and went in a flurry of conversations, jumpers, dresses, earrings and photo frames on the shop floor, a curry with friends in the evening and now it’s Sunday.

The days leading up to this weekend were all about managing distractions, displacement activity and finding moments of stillness and having found them, seeing how far and wide I could extend them.

I’d been gifted a longer than expected break from work, thanks to a combination of last week’s trip to Cardiff (I wrote about it here) and the rota fairies. A not quite, but almost two week break was mine for the taking.

“Stillness is where creativity and solutions to problems are found.”
Eckhart Tolle, Stillness Speaks

It’s rare to have so many uninterrupted days given my shift patterns and weekend working. There were half hearted thoughts of ‘doing something’ on at least one of these empty days I decided to lean into this time at home.

I guess I’m also conscious that in retail talk we’re heading into ‘Peak’. Peak as in Black Friday and oh my God, how many shopping days to Christmas. Although based on the past three days and the volume of people walking in through the shop door, we’re there already.

This is my second year of ‘Peak’ at Oliver Bonas and I can’t work out if knowing what I’m heading into is better or worse than not having a clue when I turned up to my first shift in November a few days before Black Friday last year.

So sweet, so innocent, and I wrote about it here too.

Swapping the notebook for the shopfloor

The conversational dance

This was all in the back of my mind as I looked at how I wanted to spend these empty days this week and it’s why I have little report. No big events, insights or revelations, and it was deeply satisfying despite (waves hands around at the world) everything.

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Chores, admin and a thank you

I caught up on work admin like updating my much neglected freelance writing website, Moor Communication and made inroads on a couple of client email newsletters scheduled to go out over the next few weeks.

I also owe an apology and massive thank you to everyone who’s subscribed to Gently Does It in the last I don’t know how many months. I took one look at my ‘Thank you for subscribing ’ emails and realised how hopelessly out of date they were. Thank you for bearing with me.

Ditto my About page.

Satisfying jobs I could tick off the to-do list while listening to sweet soul-infused Spotify playlists heavy on Lady Blackbird, Thee Sacred Souls and Jalen Ngonda.

I also turned to household chores, figuring that now we have fewer people living in the house I stand a better chance of getting on top of the de-cluttering but you don’t want to read about my deep cleaning the front porch, do you?

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Less Morning Pages than Any time of the day Pages

If Gently Does It took a bit of a back seat this week it did see a renewed focus on my free writing with the support of the

Breakthroughs & Blocks

November seven-day writing sprint.

I had one goal: to recommit to my daily free writing practice. It’s slipped a little these past few weeks and that’s ok, up to a point.

The things is, I love free writing and I know that if I don’t do it regularly it’s harder to write the words I share here, and any words I do share can end up feeling, I don’t know, a little tight.

If the words feel tight it’s probably because I’m feeling tight because I’m not off-loading all the rubbish filling my brain onto paper and creating space to breathe. It’s my analog version of the ‘CleanmyMac’ app that tells me my Mac has run out of space. Again.

‘Writing is physical, and it is affected by the equipment you use. In typing, your fingers hit keys and the result is block, black letters: a different aspect of yourself may come out. I have found that when I am writing something emotional, I must write it first time directly with hand on paper. Handwriting is more connected to the movement of the heart. Yet, when I tell stories, I go straight to the typewriter.’
Natalie Goldberg, Writing down the Bones

My intention is to write daily á la Julia Cameron’s Morning Pages, although my Morning Pages are often anytime of the day pages. I don’t want to set fixed or firm boundaries around this writing. It’s why I often carry my notebook with me, or leave it lying around in the house so that if I have a thought while doing the washing up, I can note it down before I forget.

I love the process of writing with pencil on paper. I love seeing increasingly illegible words cover the page as my hand and brain try to match each other in pace. I love the feel of my hand moving across the page. And I love notebooks.

I love that ‘oh, I didn’t know I was thinking that’ when I see words emerging when I’ve tapped into a stream of consciousness. I love it when I realise I’m smiling as my hand moves and the thoughts unlock.

It’s satisfying.

Morning Pages are three pages of longhand, stream of consciousness writing,
done first thing in the morning. *There is no wrong way to do Morning Pages*–
they are not high art. They are not even “writing.” They are about
anything and everything that crosses your mind– and they are for your eyes
only. Morning Pages provoke, clarify, comfort, cajole, prioritize and
synchronize the day at hand. Do not over-think Morning Pages: just put
three pages of anything on the page...and then do three more pages tomorrow.
Julia Cameron

Using the blank page to find stillness

Let’s be honest though, these blank pages don’t suddenly fill with deep and meaningful thoughts. More likely I’ll start with a gentle top to toe (tired eyes, headache-y, slept well, slept badly, lower back’s hurting again - must book physio appointment). Other times I’ll zone out the distractions by tapping into the senses and writing out everything I can see, hear, taste, touch, and smell.

Any and all words are welcome though and in a week where the world outside these four walls has felt like a lot, finding stillness on the page has been invaluable.

And the companionable silence in the headline?

I guess that came to me on Wednesday morning sitting next to

Andrea Mann

around a large table in one of our local cafes, Outside the box, during Andrea’s latest ‘Write In’. This is a fortnightly co-writing drop-in session. We sit around the largest table in the cafe, buy a coffee and write.

Sometimes we chat about what we’re working on - everything from business blogs, to Substack posts (like this one), proposals or research. Sometimes the headphones go on, sometimes there’s a little chat or we simply enjoy writing against the backdrop of clattering tea cups and conversations happening at the tables around us.

This week it was just the right amount of companionship and conversation for this writer and I spent the time chatting with Andrea, free writing and sketching out this post.

I guess there’s also something in there about observing how how I can be still in a noisy, busy environment, especially if I have a notebook and pencil with me.

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This week’s post has meandered a bit over the past few days and run into a few deadends too. For long periods I didn’t know where it was going - am I writing about working in the shop? Am I writing about writing or am I writing about being at home?

This might explain any clunky bits or a lack of flow but if nothing else, I hope it encourages you to have a go at free writing, morning pages or any kind of emptying the head writing.

Fingers crossed I’ll be back to posting on Friday again next week, thanks as ever for reading.

Harriet