It's really very revealing of how we've all been conditioned to 'do' rather than simply 'be,' Harriet. When you wrote about not trying to make yourself look busy when you didn't need to be or acknowledging that tendency to get agitated when there wasn't something pressing to do I thought YES! We need to be present more often for ourselves and for others, in the role you describe. So lovely to be able to sink into the moment and be ready should someone need you, and not feel guilty about it.
Just noodling this and how it potentially links to some other is insights I’ve had about mum and how she showed her love to us. I know there’s the bigger picture thing about ‘being’ rather than ‘doing’ but there’s also an observation my counsellor made that I’ve tucked away for over a year. It’s all linked to how I equate my worth and value with acts and actions rather than who I am & as I was writing out a memory the other week, I could see parallels with some of
Mum’s behaviour. As ever I’m pulling on a thread & even with a fairly straightforward reflective piece like this,
Thank you for these beautiful words, Harriet - I think it’s exactly what I needed to hear. Not that I’m bustling about much, but maybe I should ease off on the tongue lashing I give myself in my head for not doing more. I also wanted to say that not only do I love the word gluggle, but I have been coveting a gluggle jug for ages - sadly your pink stock has been snapped up (yes, of course I checked you link!). And I needed a reminder, most of all, to breathe through stuff. 🙏🏼
It's weird how something as basic and obvious as remembering to breathe can be so tricky. I almost didn't post because I thought people would think 'duh' what's she on about, but I have a hunch that there are a few of us around who forget to put the oxygen mask on first. PS pretty sure we have a few pink gluggle jugs in store...
I just had a horrible shouting argument in the street and guess what? Forgot to breathe & came home in tears. I’m not doing the basic things to keep myself sane. Oooooooh I might be tempted…
Oh no, I'm sorry that sounds rubbish. Take care and go easy on yourself. I'm back in store on Sunday so I'll see if there's a way to magic a pink gluggle jug to you....
I think that's what I'm learning. and thanks for sharing that, it's stayed with me these past few weeks. I think you're right, sometimes just being there and making sure someone feels seen or acknowledged is more than enough.
It's really very revealing of how we've all been conditioned to 'do' rather than simply 'be,' Harriet. When you wrote about not trying to make yourself look busy when you didn't need to be or acknowledging that tendency to get agitated when there wasn't something pressing to do I thought YES! We need to be present more often for ourselves and for others, in the role you describe. So lovely to be able to sink into the moment and be ready should someone need you, and not feel guilty about it.
Just noodling this and how it potentially links to some other is insights I’ve had about mum and how she showed her love to us. I know there’s the bigger picture thing about ‘being’ rather than ‘doing’ but there’s also an observation my counsellor made that I’ve tucked away for over a year. It’s all linked to how I equate my worth and value with acts and actions rather than who I am & as I was writing out a memory the other week, I could see parallels with some of
Mum’s behaviour. As ever I’m pulling on a thread & even with a fairly straightforward reflective piece like this,
I can feel lightbulbs going off.
Thank you for these beautiful words, Harriet - I think it’s exactly what I needed to hear. Not that I’m bustling about much, but maybe I should ease off on the tongue lashing I give myself in my head for not doing more. I also wanted to say that not only do I love the word gluggle, but I have been coveting a gluggle jug for ages - sadly your pink stock has been snapped up (yes, of course I checked you link!). And I needed a reminder, most of all, to breathe through stuff. 🙏🏼
It's weird how something as basic and obvious as remembering to breathe can be so tricky. I almost didn't post because I thought people would think 'duh' what's she on about, but I have a hunch that there are a few of us around who forget to put the oxygen mask on first. PS pretty sure we have a few pink gluggle jugs in store...
I just had a horrible shouting argument in the street and guess what? Forgot to breathe & came home in tears. I’m not doing the basic things to keep myself sane. Oooooooh I might be tempted…
Oh no, I'm sorry that sounds rubbish. Take care and go easy on yourself. I'm back in store on Sunday so I'll see if there's a way to magic a pink gluggle jug to you....
If they have any, I can transfer ££ you you, but please don’t go out of your way 😉
Simply being there, available has much greater impact than you’d imagine! 🙏🏻✨
I think that's what I'm learning. and thanks for sharing that, it's stayed with me these past few weeks. I think you're right, sometimes just being there and making sure someone feels seen or acknowledged is more than enough.